Transfer Day is Tomorrow!

The big day is Tomorrow! I actually was hoping it would be tomorrow bc I only work a half day. Its easier to cancel that than a whole day. But on Tues., May 17 at 11am...I will be FINALLY meeting my embies.

Is it weird that I think about them? Like how they could one day be an actual person?!

I know that my butt is a little sore from the progesterone oil shots. Okay, it's not my actual butt but right near the top. And it DOES hurt. So no laughing. :)

All the pain, shots, endless doctor appointments will be totally worth it if I get to meet my little baby in 9ish months.

I want to be a mom. I feel like everything about my life points in the direction that I am meant to be a mother. Is that so much to ask??

When my first IUI was positive but not really, it was devastating. I didn't consider it a miscarriage or anything that either because the nurse said not to.

But now it is different because these embies have been growing more and are going to depend on me and my body to grow.

This is a LOT of pressure not to mention stress. I'm feeling better than yesterday but still worried I'm getting a cold. Between my DH's cold, all the meds I'm on  and this weather....my body is confused. I REALLY need it not to be though. It needs to be totally ready to go.

I need this to work. We both want it to work. Sure its not the best timing in the world but it may be our only shot.

Our amazing insurance is changing (not by our choice) in a little over a month. So who knows what kind of IF treatments will be covered?!

Yeah DH dropped that poop bomb right before bed last night. "Oh by the way"....

So cross your fingers, toes, eyes, whatever and think super sticky vibes tomorrow around 11am central time. I need all the help I can get!

Dear Embies,

I don't know you yet but you're already a part of me. Literally. And to think that one day you may be in my arms as a smiley, crying, poopy diapered baby makes me so happy. A little scared too, I will admit. No matter how stressed Daddy gets, he does want you too. I think he may even love you already. Or at least the idea of you. I know I do.

So tomorrow when you start your life in my uterus, please feel free to make it your home. Mi casa es sus casa. (not sure that's right). But please, please...decide to stay, and grow into a healthy, happy baby girl or boy. Boy AND girl would be okay too. Or 2 boys or 2 girls.

Just try not to make it 8. That does get Daddy in panic mode. :)

We want to be blessed by you. God willing you will be ours forever. It all starts tomorrow. It's a big day. So get plenty of rest and prepare yourself to stick in the right place and grow.

Somehow Mommy will find the strength to not freak out every time something happens down there. And Mommy will also try very hard not to pee on the doctor seeing as you will be "delivered" while I have a full bladder.

My hope is to one day hold you and take you by your hand. I want to hug and kiss you. I want to scare the boogyman away and kiss your boo boos. I want to tell you to be nice to the doggies and people that you meet. I want to introduce you to a whole range of family members that will love you too. Your handprints and footprints will be Mother's Day gifts, and your first everythings will make all the hard work worth it.

You're already exciting to me/us. All the possibilities that come with you and what your miraculous life will be.

Please let this be it. I pray to God that you are on your way into our lives.

Love,
Hopefully Mommy